You cant please evrybody all the tym :D "Wateva"

Have you ever been in a place where you feel victimized by a friend, a boss or a lover who has treated us poorly or unfairly. How conveniently we start to believe that we are not worth it start feeling the innocent victim of bad treatment But if you start to look back and analyze a bit, you may realize that  there is one common denominator in each scenario and situation. That common is you.

We are the one who allow other to treat us exactly how they want to, I know people who have settled for way less then they deserve and considering it as destiny, I’m sure you know a lot of people who have it all together in their life but when it comes to dealing with relationships they adjusting with those douche bags

Even in my life I've tolerated people who don't appreciate me, who don't value my heart, who take and take, who don't call back, who have disrespected me. I've made excuses, justified and eagerly re-entered the game of push and pull with people who clearly don't really value me much at all. And you know what, it sucks and feels pretty crappy at the end -- chipping away the low self-esteem that got me there in the first place even more.

And you know you feel heart aches, heart tramples, picking up that phone when every cell in your body knows it's the unhealthy thing to do, still you can’t let go of it. The important thing for you at that point of time is to wake up and realize that the most important relationship in your life is the one with your own self.

Learn to embrace self-love and stop apologizing for who you are and learn that you are perfect the way you are right now, right here. I will constantly be growing, evolving and working on bad habits, but those flaws, those imperfections are part of the beauty that makes me, me. I can now easily recognize people who are drawn to me only for the best of me, and as Marilyn Monroe best put it, "If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."

Your heart is a precious gift. Your body is a temple. Be selective. Respect it and be respected. Love yourself and be loved. It you don't respect and love yourself first, building a healthy relationship with another is like building a house with no foundation..

Know your value and don't accept being treated in a way less than you deserve. Now this doesn’t mean that you become unrealistic and demand ponies and castles but yes off course I am saying that you deserve to be treated the way you treat others, and vice versa. The minute you negotiate your self-worth and accept less, you say to the universe that you don't deserve any better, and the vicious cycle/pattern begins.

Choose to completely surround yourself with positive, inspiring influences. You will feel much happier and better about yourself .Just delete the people who make you feel bad about yourself you don’t need them in your life

The most important thing to remember is that you are worth it, you can go another day, and you can be happy. Life will not throw you anything you cannot handle or overcome.

Once you start to accept and love yourself and your desired path, the smoke will clear and you will breathe easy again

Once you try to live up to an image of what you think others want to you to be, you lose your self-worth. Instead, you are following a compass set by other people's expectations, whether or not those expectations are clearly defined or implied. Affirmative talk is not the sole solution but it is part of a range of methods for boosting yourself and for taking out time to acknowledge that you do matter -- just as much as every person around you.

There is this on song  which I love and would like to quote “You can’t please everybody all the time so instead of trying I say “whatever”.

Stop trying to please everyone and yes that’s the key only if you know what’s important and who is worth keeping there will be no one yes I mean no one who will ever have to face the disgrace of being disrespected.

Happiness .....Secret for a longer life :P

How many of you actually feel like jumping on the bed and singing your lungs out with no audience around? Have you ever felt like going out in the rain and letting yourself get in the moment without noticing who is noticing you ! You are in room full of mature people and you want to crack a joke do you ? Noticing your crush walk by and pretending they don’t even exists just cause “what people might say “. Even if you want to act like “who cares “ you cant cause you are supposedly a mature adult working 9 to 5 , so wait you have to grow up . DO you !

My life is not perfect , I’m not always happy yes sometimes I do sit alone  writing and listening to songs that might make me cry does that make me “ not so happy person “ .

We have basically developed a line that our happiness depends on the approval of others .

This means that our level of contentment is proportionate to how pleased we think others are with us moment to moment. The problem is that we rarely think they approve of us enough, so we  are  rarely happy.

We  never think  about what we  want from life, only what would make others want to have us  around.

As William Shakespeare famously wrote, “Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.”

We think differently and act opposite of that just cause people wont approve , but is this making us happy ?

We each walk around with two versions of ourselves. One is our unconditioned self, which is innocent, flawless, and untouched by any trauma, criticism, or injustice we may have faced in life. The other is a learned self, more commonly known as the ego , the innocent child that has been forced to grow up !

The primary role of the ego is to separate you from the truth of who you really are The ego believes that happiness is attained through material success, achievement, deserving basically doing everything which limits you from “joy”..

But your unconditioned self is the much bigger, wiser you. It already knows that you are what you seek; that real happiness is what naturally happens when you dare to show up unedited , be who u want to be either its being an adult and serious about life or being careless and enjoying every moment just the way you want it to be .

The more we are willing to love ourselves, in all our messy glory, the less we go searching for happiness in the wrong places. When we are comforted by our own self-love, we no longer need to find comfort through external fixes.

Ultimately, the human experience is about connecting with other people. Connection is what provides value and meaning to our lives..

When you cease to make a contribution, you begin to die.
—Eleanor Roosevelt

If you allow your fear or shame to prevent you from showcasing your true self, then you will be preventing yourself from connecting fully with others. If you want to be able to move past fear, judgement, and uncertainty and into a healthier and happier life, then you have to give yourself permission first. You have to decide that you’re worthy.

If you always look toward tomorrow for happiness, odds are you will do the same when you attain what you’ve been dreaming of. We have forgotten to live in the moment by worrying about the future , will i have my dream house , will i get promotion  , what if i don’t get married to the right person hahhh !

You never know when your now’s will run out, so ask yourself, “How can I be that person I want to be in this moment?”

Start accepting things for how they are, regardless of whether you think it’s right or wrong.  Accept it as a fact.

Let’s say that you are frustrated because a work colleague isn’t doing what you think they should be doing.  The more you think about that situation, the more frustrated you get.  You give them feedback.  Maybe you argue with them.  But the situation doesn’t improve or maybe it gets even worse.

you can keep resisting or you can accept the situation without judgement.  You simply acknowledge it as a fact. There is no right or wrong. the resistance starts to melt away and the negative emotions inside your head and heart also start to disappear.

Always have good vibes around you avoid the negative people around you the

ones who seem to only see the negative side to every situation.  They are often pessimistic, angry, critical and rarely have anything constructive to say

Don’t allow negative people or situations to also drag you down into unhappiness.

One really powerful way to increase your happiness is to focus on helping others.  You can give money to charity — but there are more fulfilling ways of helping others.

Instead of giving money, give your time, just perform small random acts of kindness with no expectation of getting anything back

Are You Having FOMO?* “Fear Of Missing Out”!

Wake up. Text. breakfast. Twitter. Go to school. Facebook. Lunch. Instagram. Back to class. Snapchat. Dinner. Tumblr. Homework. Skype. Sleep. Repeat the process.

You wake up in the middle of the night to use the washroom and check all the social network sites and retweet Rihanna before you roll over and go back to sleep.

We all know what it’s like to be at a restaurant or a party with friends, or at a family gathering where everyone is chit-chatting, except not exactly with each other. Alternatively, we’re all crouched over our mobile devices, tweeting, posting pictures and conversing with people in another far away land and ultimately neglecting the people around us. On one hand, it’s easy to admit that social media has taken over and completely changed human interaction as we once knew it to be, but on the other hand, I thank the technology gods every day that it exists—especially now that I live on the other side of the world from friends and family. You see, I have this thing called FOMO.

Fear Of Missing Out----The conviction that everyone else is having a better time of life than us. Going to better parties, getting better jobs being happier and more socially active. Going out to lunch or dinner or may be going to a party and taking hundreds of pictures so you could upload on instagram or facebook and creating a sense of fomo among your friends and followers the pressure to do this can make it difficult for us to enjoy the moment as we are all absorbed in taking selfies rather than interacting with the people around.

“Now, if I got to a party, I’ll probably  spend most of my time thinking about what I’m going to tweet about it, so the party sounds really amazing. ‘Or I’ll be thinking in which angle I should take my selfie”

Fomo is actually regarded as one of the most potent social anxieties of our age.

The word “FOMO” secured urban dictionary mentions in 2011 and made to the Oxford English Dictionary in august 2013.

It’s the reason we find ourselves wondering if not knowing Hannah Montana means we are irredeemably out of the loop .Its why we think we must start watching “Game of thrones” not because we want to, but because everyone else is going crazy for it. In this way we happen to develop an artificial persona, to live this externally constructed life and hence we end up with an audience and not friends.

 For example, Have you ever made an album on facebook with a series of pictures with your hair and makeup done and trying to show your friends that your and getting ready for a big night out and then updating status all night long . But the thing is there is no party we are going though all of the trouble just to show our FB friends that we are cool and get a bundle of like on instagram.

On Facebook; friends are sharing their newly taken holiday pictures across the social platform and generate envies across their network. On the visual-driven social platform, Instagram, we can see how our friends are eating exotic animals, drinking delicious looking cocktails and even regular sunny-side up eggs, eggs look hip & fashionable. And if we left Twitter for a few seconds, we would miss out on how “very not-mainstream“the new music video of Justin biber is. To bring it to the point: Everywhere where you are not, things are happening.

“We are the generation of Social Media; our biggest Revolution is a Tweet of 141 Characters.”

A study conducted by the University of Chicago found that social media can be even more addictive than cigarettes!                       

 Symptoms of social media addiction include spending at least four hours a day using it, bringing mobile phones to the bathroom, checking websites as soon as you wake up and just before you go to bed, cancelling activities and feeling anxious when you cannot get onto the Internet. You may think that following fitness freaks or checking up on your ex or your enemies are all harmless ways to pass time, but those things can lead to self-doubt and depression.

I’d like to urge you people of the digital world to step away from your Smartphone or computer every once in a while. There’s this really awesome place I heard about a while ago called “Outside”. It’s a place where you engage in tangible experiences rather than virtual ones. I know it can sound a little intimidating at first, but I promise you’ll love it!

Read it. Enjoy it. Share it. No one wants to miss out on these news.

                                      

Pakistan: Safe And Hospitable For Cricket

COMSATS Institute of Information Technology (CIIT) Lahore took a big step in positive development related to the revival of international cricket in Pakistan, by organizing the COMSATS-Lancaster Cricket Championship 2014.

It was the first time after the British Universities’ tour in 2012 that a UK outfit visited Pakistan for a cricket tournament.

It is an interesting fact that most Pakistanis become more patriotic at such events in the country. I have no contention with them, seeing that I, too, belong to this group. I do however have a problem with some expats who badmouth and spread negative views about Pakistan and its inhabitants.

Have you ever tried searching Google for images of Pakistan? You’ll be hard-pressed to find any pictures that depict the progressive and modern aspects of our country. Try typing ‘Pakistan progress’, ‘Pakistan modern’ or ‘Pakistan cafes’ in the search bar, and chances are there will be no results. But if you just type in the word Pakistan, you’ll be flooded by a collection of frightening pictures (excluding some seductive shots of ‘Miss Pakistan’): kids holding guns, bomb blasts and violence will inundate your computer screen.

When will the world see Pakistan from all angles – the good, the bad and everything else in between?

The only way we can get people to expand their vision of Pakistan is by experiencing it first hand and by showing our beautiful and safe sides to the world and this championship worked wonders or should i say will work wonders for the revival of cricket in Pakistan which have been affected in the past due to some sad incidents.

I talked to one of the team members of Lancaster UK  and asked him about their stay in Pakistan,

He had a thoughtful expression on his face and  suddenly overcome by the urge to reveal a thought: ‘You know… Pakistan really isn't marketed properly. This place is really nice. It’s clean, you've got café’s and places to relax, you can walk on the streets with ease,’ he points out. ‘But people out there don’t know that,’

And I’m amused with his thoughts well he certainly is right we are blessed with so many wonders and yet we don’t know.

In my encounter with Joe Molly captain of the Lancaster team I got a chance to ask him about the impression of Pakistan he had before coming and how did it change?

“We heard that it’s not safe out there and people are hostile but that is so not true I so wanna come back as people here in Pakistan are so damn nice and hospitable “

On my question about playing cricket in Pakistan Joe replied “Pakistan is a safe country for holding sports events International cricket should come to Pakistan which is now being played at neutral venues And that the Formation of big3 wasn't fair “

So here was my take on this step hopefully our country will welcome more international and national teams for sports and justice will be served.